Deborah Brooks MA, CCC/SLP

Speech Language Pathologist

Deb Thoughts: Everything you want to be, you already are.

Deborah Brooks

People are always saying “don’t compare yourself to others…” but I don’t think that is necessarily, good advice. I think you should absolutely compare yourself to others. I think that you should look at the people around you and identify what you admire, and reach for it. You should also look at people around you and identify unflattering behavior and undesirable personality types, and avoid becoming that.  Don’t feel sad for yourself thinking others are better, better yourself and use others as an example. Choose ideas that are aligned with success. Don’t be envious, or self doubting, be better. Plus, no one actually knows anything. So, if you think you would be happier in another person’s shoes, you’re silly to think you even know how to tie them. I think you should reflect on what you have, in comparison to what others possess, and ask yourself, “Would I be happier if I had that? Or would I just find something else to feel drab about? Would it even make a difference?” Maybe “comparison is the thief of joy” if you are you are putting others on a pedestal and in turn putting yourself in the gutter. But, that’s super egotistical of you to think you really understand how another person’s life is. I think you should observe how people behave and who they have become as a result of  what they have known, based on their experiences, and you should appreciate the fact that, everyone is who they are because their mindset. You are your thoughts and your thoughts become you. It’s all in your head. At the end of the day, no matter what, you should believe and know wholeheartedly within yourself, that: I am who I want to be. Everything you want to be, you already are, you just have to accept it. So, you should compare yourself to others and think… “I’d rather be me, because my experiences have shaped me to be who I have become and I’d rather miss out on the perks of attaining the things I was envious of because I wouldn’t trade who I am for a better outfit, car, career, house, apartment, shack...” You should think to yourself, “I’d rather have what I have and be me than gamble on being someone else.” So go on and compare yourself to others and then choose to be you.